Tag Archives: bikes

Bicyclists Are So Fucking Dedicated To Getting In Everyone’s Way That They’re Even Bicycling Up The Goddamn Stairs Now

I am not exaggerating when I say I might hate this guy more than anyone on earth. I hate him with every fiber of my being. I hate him from the tips of my toes all the way up to the pointiest hair on my head. I hate him with every single breath I take. The rest of my life is going to be a little bit worse every single day just from knowing that this lycra-encased garbage monster exists under the same sun as me. Continue reading

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I Always Thought Mad Max Was A Work Of Fiction But Apparently It Was Actually A Documentary About Australian Bicyclists

[The Age] It was a case of road rage on two wheels this week as a squadron of cyclists assaulted a motorist in Fitzroy. The melee began on Tuesday in Mater Street, Collingwood, with a verbal altercation between the driver and … Continue reading

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If You Think Being Four Years Old Means You Don’t Have To Obey Cycling Laws, Think The Fuck Again

[People] It was a slow day of crime in Grantham, England, on March 9, apparently. Sophie Lindley, 4, was biking along Trent Road with her dad, when a police officer approached her and said she had to get off the … Continue reading

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Lazy, Hypocritical Bicyclists Can’t Even Maintain Their Own Bike Lanes

[The Age] A motorist wielding a large wooden bat attacked a group of cyclists after screaming abuse at them, one of the riders has claimed. A triathlete, who requested to be known only as Brad, said he was riding with his coach and … Continue reading

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This Disgusting Poster Implying That Bicyclists Are In Any Way Sexually Desirable Has Been Rightly Banned

Welcome to the fight, Belgium. Continue reading

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Nothing New Here, Just A Rage-Fueled Bike Monster Punching A 78-Year-Old Man In The Face

[Cleveland Plain Dealer] A 78-year-old Parma Heights man was assaulted by a man riding a bicycle Feb. 19. The bicyclist was riding in the roadway, and when the older man told him to move over, the bicyclist broke his side mirror … Continue reading

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Kangaroos Are The Latest Animals To Join Mother Nature’s Battle Against Bicyclists

[Canberra Times] Darren Jones is one of a string of bike riders to have narrowly survived collisions with kangaroos across Canberra.  The 45-year-old father was flung off his bike when a kangaroo jumped out and hit his front wheel at … Continue reading

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Lance Armstrong Gives His Bicyclist Detractors A Giant Middle Finger, Says If He Could Go Back In Time He’d Cheat All Over Again

[BBC] Shamed cyclist Lance Armstrong believes the time is coming when he should be forgiven for doping and lying – and told the BBC he would probably do it again. Armstrong, 43, was stripped of his record seven Tour de France … Continue reading

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Bono May Never Play Guitar Again Because He Got Run Over By A Bicyclist While Also Riding A Bicycle

[CNN] Bono has shared with fans that recovery from an accident has been slow going and that he’s worried he may never play guitar again. The U2 frontman underwent hours of multiple surgeries in November after a bicycle accident in … Continue reading

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Oklahoma City Gets It, Is Considering A Three Foot Rule For Bicyclists Instead Of Drivers

[Bike OKC] A new ordinance put forward by councilman Pat Ryan (Ward 8) would require bikes to maintain 3 feet between themselves and any motor vehicles traveling in the same direction.  The measure has been approved by the Oklahoma City Traffic Commission … Continue reading

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