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Recent Posts
- The COVID-19 Pandemic Has Officially Broken The Bicyclist Community
- I Decided To Research What Bicyclists Eat And What I Found Was Horrifying
- 81-Year-Old Bicyclist Rides Past Airport, Promptly Gets Blown the Fuck Away by Jet Engine
- Idiot Bicyclist Can’t Even Get The Old “Flaming Dog Poop On The Doorstep” Gag Right
- Whether 20 Years Old or 90 Years Old, You Can Always Count On A Bicyclist To Dope
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Category Archives: Uncategorized
The COVID-19 Pandemic Has Officially Broken The Bicyclist Community
[Wall Street Journal] [NAME REDACTED] used to consider cycling to work at a Toronto, Canada, ad agency every day as part of his identity. He would share harrowing tales of cars cutting him off and him screaming at drivers. Then … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, cycling, cyclist, darwinism, road warrior
2 Comments
I Decided To Research What Bicyclists Eat And What I Found Was Horrifying
Frankly, the words “malt loaf” made me gag a little right off the bat, but I decided to be open minded. I stifled my vomit and forged ahead, determined to see what exactly bicyclists are stuffing into their bodies. Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
2 Comments
In Classic Bicyclist Fashion, Bicyclist Assaults Driver And Attempts To Steal Car With Children Still Inside
[ITV] A cyclist with road rage has been jailed after attempting to hijack a family’s car with the owner’s children still sat in the back. Dean David Price, 36, argued with the father who owned the car in the street … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals, Uncategorized
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It Appears That, In My Absence, Bicyclists Have Decided That Getting Naked And Assaulting Women Is Just Fine
[FORT WORTH (CBSDFW.COM)] Police have released a sketch of the man they say shed his clothes, hopped on a bicycle naked then chased down a jogger before jumping off and assaulting her on Saturday. A witness saw the man sitting on a … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
2 Comments
I Bet You Thought Those Inflatable Bike Helmets Were Pretty Stupid, Didn’t You? Well Guess What, You Were Right!
[Cycling Weekly – Link to Instagram Video] True to the claim that the helmet will deploy at speed, this one went off as a man put on his coat in a shop. The Hövding Airbag helmet was released to much speculation earlier … Continue reading
Posted in Stupidity, Uncategorized
Tagged bicycle, bicycles, bicyclist, bicyclists, bike, biker, bikers, bikes, biking, cycling, cyclist, cyclists, darwinism, idiots, natural selection, road warrior, savages, stupid twats
2 Comments
The Noble Moose Is The Latest Of Mother Nature’s Beasts To Take A Brave Stand Against Bicyclists
[Great Falls Tribune] BOZEMAN – A bicyclist is recovering from a broken arm after colliding with a mother moose. The Bozeman Daily Chronicle reports Montana Fish, Wildlife and Parks spokeswoman Andrea Jones says signage has been posted warning people about the … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged bicycle, bicycles, bicyclist, bicyclists, bike, Bike War, biker, bikers, bikes, biking, cycling, cyclist, cyclists, darwinism, idiots, moose, mother nature, natural selection, nature, road warrior
3 Comments
Bono May Never Play Guitar Again Because He Got Run Over By A Bicyclist While Also Riding A Bicycle
[CNN] Bono has shared with fans that recovery from an accident has been slow going and that he’s worried he may never play guitar again. The U2 frontman underwent hours of multiple surgeries in November after a bicycle accident in … Continue reading
Heh.
[SB Nation] Yes. Yes, this will do nicely. Don’t worry, poor bicyclist, I’m sure this won’t end up everywhere and you can– — Heh.
Posted in Uncategorized
2 Comments
This Bicyclist Commenter Is NOT Happy With Me
Hoo boy! Settle down, little doggie! I gotta say, I knew there were a lot of bicyclists out there who hate me, but I didn’t realize I was inspiring internet fanfiction about my gruesome murder. This is a whole new … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged bicycle, bicycles, bicyclist, bicyclists, bike, biker, bikers, bikes, biking, crybabies, cycling, cyclist, cyclists, darwinism, failures, idiots, natural selection, road warrior, savages, stupid twats, vagabonds
4 Comments
Apparently DC Is Hosting The “National Bike Summit” Next Month, So I Guess That’s When I’m Going To Kill Myself
[Philadelphia Inquirer] In a few weeks, I’m going to ride my bicycle from New York City to Washington, D.C. I have never attempted such a feat before — certainly not in the winter! But I’m not crazy, I promise. I’m … Continue reading
Posted in Stupidity, Uncategorized
Tagged bicycle, bicycles, bicyclist, bicyclists, bike, biker, bikers, bikes, biking, cycling, cyclist, cyclists, darwinism, DC, failures, idiots, inmates running the asylum, natural selection, New York, Philadelphia, road warrior, savages, stupid twats, vagabonds
6 Comments