Tag Archives: rise up animal kingdom

Been A While Since I Posted, Hasn’t It? Anyway, Here’s A Story About A Kangaroo Exploding A Bicyclist’s Fake Boobs

(AP) CANBERRA, Australia — A woman says she and a friend were injured when they were jumped by a kangaroo while cycling in an Australian wine region. Sharon Heinrich, 45, said Monday that she and her friend Helen Salter, 47, were … Continue reading

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If You’re Thinking Of Going For A Bike Ride In Australia, The Kangaroos Would Like You To Think Again

[Canberra Times] A cyclist has filmed an “unnerving” encounter with a group of kangaroos on Melbourne’s north-eastern outskirts. Ben Vezina was riding in Hawkstowe Park near Hurstbridge on Sunday when he came across the mobbing marsupials down a deserted dirt track. In … Continue reading

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Pretty Sure Parrots Just Sided With Me In The Battle Against Bicyclists

[Barstool Sports] Hah love it. Oh sorry Mr. Doucheonabike, your life is much, much less important than my bird who’s dying on me. Bike douche didn’t even know how to respond. It’s not all about you just because you’re on … Continue reading

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Turns Out Turkeys Fucking Hate Bicyclists Too

[Stamford Advocate] Officials in Hartford had to shoo a turkey out of a downtown hospital, National Geographic News has reported, and a bunch of turkeys once marched up on the porch of a house in Boston and refused to leave, making hostages … Continue reading

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Another Animal Kingdom Heard From: Cats Have Launched Their First Attack Against The Bicyclist Menace

[FOX Sports] Colombian cyclist Rafael Infantino had a close call of the feline kind during the men’s time trial at the UCI Road World Championships when a cat strayed onto the course. The cat was waiting as Infantino rounded a … Continue reading

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Another Species Heard From: Wolves Hate Bicyclists Too

[Spokesman-Review] Growing up in the Yukon, Melanie Klassen had seen numerous bicycle tourists pedaling the Alaska Highway, but never one with a canine companion running behind him. “I thought it was odd until I saw the panicked look on the … Continue reading

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Dog Almost Causes Massive Crash At The Tour De France, Proves Once Again That The Entire Animal Kingdom Is On My Side

[TIME] Quelle horreur! A small dog nearly caused a not-small crash at the Tour de France this weekend after he got loose and dashed across the racetrack. The incident occurred just a few miles from the finish line during the event’s second stage. … Continue reading

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Bears Stage Non-Violent Protest of Bicyclists Invading Their Homeland

The future of the GranFondo Banff is uncertain after a last minute change to the route of the cycling event was made necessary by the presence of feeding bears. It was the first cycling event of its kind, a 142-kilometer … Continue reading

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Another Animal Kingdom Heard From: The Cows Have Chosen a Side

BILLINGS, Mont. (AP) — A construction worker who tried to help police corral a runaway cow said the bovine charged at him “like a bull at a rodeo,” tossing him into the air before continuing its rampage through the streets … Continue reading

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Magpies Are Officially the Greatest Birds in the Fucking World

    Yes, it’s that season again, when magpies swoop and cyclists are skittish. Just as it starts to warm up and the mornings aren’t quite as dark comes the ever-present threat of feathered fury from the sky. Back in … Continue reading

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