Another Animal Kingdom Heard From: Cats Have Launched Their First Attack Against The Bicyclist Menace

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[FOX Sports] Colombian cyclist Rafael Infantino had a close call of the feline kind during the men’s time trial at the UCI Road World Championships when a cat strayed onto the course.

The cat was waiting as Infantino rounded a corner near a time check, forcing him to take evasive action as the frightened animal performed a classic cat jump before scurrying off the course.

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: I don’t advocate violence against bicyclists. No, there’s no need for us to sink to their level. After all, they do a good enough job of beating the shit out of each other and getting themselves killed by running red lights.

But that said, I can’t do anything about nature, and Mother Nature has proven time and time again that she is firmly on the anti-bicyclist side of things. Bears, deer, birds…animals of every shape, size, and genus have taken to the streets to oppose the bicyclist menace. And I know it was probably only a matter of time, but it seems that cats have now fired their opening salvo.

Cats are solitary creatures. They don’t like to be bothered. So it would obviously take a SERIOUS level of douchebaggery for a cat to willingly leave the comfort of its own territory to run out into the middle of a crowded event. And that’s where the bicyclists come in. Yup, even the most solitary and antisocial of all animals hate bicyclists so much that they’d rather make an exhibition of themselves in the middle of a crowded sporting event than just let it stand. A+ effort, cat. A fucking plus.

About Falco

I hate bicyclists. My only regret is that I can't grow a beard.
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1 Response to Another Animal Kingdom Heard From: Cats Have Launched Their First Attack Against The Bicyclist Menace

  1. r3dbull4dd1kt says:

    Cats are the Dane Cook of the Animal Kingdom–brash and uncharacteristically evil while somehow appealing to a wide audience…when they decide to take sides, Its ON!

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