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Recent Posts
- In Maybe the Saddest Development of All Time, Bicyclists Are Now Using “Bike Escalators” to Climb Hills
- Bicyclist Tries to Tattle on Driver to the Police, Promptly Gets Uno Reversed to the Moon
- The COVID-19 Pandemic Has Officially Broken The Bicyclist Community
- I Decided To Research What Bicyclists Eat And What I Found Was Horrifying
- 81-Year-Old Bicyclist Rides Past Airport, Promptly Gets Blown the Fuck Away by Jet Engine
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Category Archives: Criminals
News of the Week That Should Surprise No One: Bicyclists Still Riding Around Naked and Traumatizing Women
COLUMBUS, Ohio – A man is being charged with public indecency after allegedly riding his bicycle while naked. Paul James Donahue was arrested on Monday afternoon after a witness said that he saw Donahue, 43, naked on his bicycle riding past … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, perverts, road warrior, vagabonds
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Bicyclists No Longer Content With Just Obstructing Traffic, Now Delaying Your Train Rides Too
A bicyclist who rode down the ramp of a CTA Blue Line station on the West Side on Wednesday morning was not seriously injured after he lost control of his bike and wound up on the tracks. The CTA was … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, darwinism, natural selection, public transportation, road warrior
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Bicyclist Rides Around in Circles, Sits on the Ground, Tells Everyone He Got Hit By a Car
NAPLES, FL – Naples Police arrested a bicyclist after he lied about having been hit by a vehicle that fled the scene of the accident at 15th Avenue North and 10th Street North, according to police reports. According to reports, Naples … Continue reading
Bicyclists Running Over Little Old Ladies Now Because They Just Don’t Give a Fuck
A writer has called for the introduction of a “cycling licence” after her elderly mother was knocked down and injured twice in a month. Petronella Wyatt said many riders were “rogues” and “as low as the meanest hit-men”. Her mother … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, road warrior, vagabonds
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Bicyclists Starting to Go All ’28 Days Later’ on Us
A 71-year-old Cambridge man told police he was driving down Concord Avenue near Parker Street at 11:20 a.m. on Aug. 28 when a cyclist reportedly started banging on his passenger side window and door, denting the door with a kick. … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, inmates running the asylum, road warrior, vagabonds
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Bicyclist Runs Over Hiker and Calls Him a “Motherfucking Faggot,” Promptly Gets the Shit Kicked Out of Him Because Bicyclists Are Pussies
A small peloton of Lycra-clad cyclists came northbound around a bend, taking up both lanes. Most moved over into the northbound lane; one just waved his hand at me to give way, which would have put me into a particularly ugly-looking … Continue reading
Another Day, Another Bicyclist Rolling Around Town with a Concealed Weapon While He Has Outstanding Warrants
At 4:30 a.m., Sgt. Schuette and Deputy Easter observed a subject on a bicycle matching the description of an armed robbery suspect. Upon making contact they found the subject was concealing a loaded handgun. The subject was arrested for carrying … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, road warrior, vagabonds
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Just Another Bicyclist Verbally Assaulting a Woman and Punching the Shit Out of Her Car
KITTERY, Maine — Police have released a photo of a bicyclist suspected in a road rage incident and are asking the public’s help in identifying him. The suspect was involved in an incident on Monday, Sept. 3 with a local … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, road warrior
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Bicyclists Just Flashing Guns at Schools Now
A bicyclist with a holstered handgun was detained by police and released without charges this morning after causing a lockdown at Grand Junction High School. The bicyclist, a man who Grand Junction Police Sgt. Dave Stassen described to be in … Continue reading
Bicyclists Are Such Ridiculous Hypocrites I Can’t Even Stand It
Free speech? Natalie Plummer was reportedly just trying to be neighborly when she spotted a police speed trap on her way home (via bicycle) in Houston. She quickly made and held up a makeshift sign to warn drivers, which the … Continue reading
I HATE BICYCLISTS 