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Recent Posts
- In Maybe the Saddest Development of All Time, Bicyclists Are Now Using “Bike Escalators” to Climb Hills
- Bicyclist Tries to Tattle on Driver to the Police, Promptly Gets Uno Reversed to the Moon
- The COVID-19 Pandemic Has Officially Broken The Bicyclist Community
- I Decided To Research What Bicyclists Eat And What I Found Was Horrifying
- 81-Year-Old Bicyclist Rides Past Airport, Promptly Gets Blown the Fuck Away by Jet Engine
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Author Archives: Falco
Bicyclist Forces Driver Off the Road and Sends Him and His Car Flying into the Water
YORK — A New York man escaped from his submerged pickup after it crashed through a guardrail Sunday night on Sewall’s Bridge, which connects Seabury and Organug roads over the York River. Michael E. Chandler, 50, of Schenectady, N.Y., told police … Continue reading
Magpies Are Officially the Greatest Birds in the Fucking World
Yes, it’s that season again, when magpies swoop and cyclists are skittish. Just as it starts to warm up and the mornings aren’t quite as dark comes the ever-present threat of feathered fury from the sky. Back in … Continue reading
Posted in Animals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, natural selection, rise up animal kingdom
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You Guessed It: Bicyclists Just Exposing Themselves to Random Passersby Now
WITNESSES who may have seen a cyclist exposed himself in Sleaford are being urged to come forward. At around 1.15pm on Saturday July 30, a man revealed himself to a passenger in a car travelling down London Road by the … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, perverts, vagabonds
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Elephants Know Whose Side They’re On!
It’s drive on the left, pass on the right in India, where at least that part of British colonization is still rooted. This elephant got the first part of the memo, but apparently not the second. Or maybe it’s … Continue reading
Posted in Animals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, darwinism, natural selection, rise up animal kingdom
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The NY Times’ Randy Cohen Is Literally the Worst Human Being on the Fucking Planet
THE rule-breaking cyclist that people decry: that’s me. I routinely run red lights, and so do you. I flout the law when I’m on my bike; you do it when you are on foot, at least if you are like … Continue reading
Posted in Stupidity
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, darwinism, natural selection, road warrior
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Typical Bicyclist Just Spitting on Normal Everyday Citizens Now
Brisbane’s walkers and joggers are apparently under attack at the moment. Not by some sex fiend but by a cyclist who has taken to spitting on them. Safe Cycling Australia has come to us for help in idenfiying and reporting Brisbane’s … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, road warrior, vagabonds
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Genius Bicyclist Shocked to Discover that Coffee Is Hot
A cyclist was drinking coffee, became startled because it was “too hot” and crashed in Brisbane’s inner city yesterday. This incident has been highlighted by police as an “example of reckless behaviour that could have had a much worse outcome … Continue reading
Posted in Stupidity
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, darwinism, natural selection
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Bicyclists Don’t Just Ignore Laws, Now They’re Straight Up Shooting Cops
Police say while an officer was patrolling the area near 24th Street and Roosevelt Thursday night, he noticed someone on a bicycle that looked suspicious. That officer decided to approach the cyclist, but after making contact, the cyclist pulled out … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, road warrior
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This Pittsburgh Bicyclist’s Letter Proves That They Seriously Do Not Fucking Get It
The responsibility of avoiding crashes lies especially with drivers given that they are the ones operating 4-5,000 lbs. of steel that can go faster and cause more damage than people riding 25 lb. bikes. Drivers must respect the rights of … Continue reading
Posted in Stupidity
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, darwinism, natural selection, road warrior
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Bicyclists Block Entire Road, Attack 20-Year-Old Girl’s Car and Leave Her Crying
TEWKSBURY TWP. – A group of cyclists allegedly surrounded and attacked a vehicle Sunday after the driver, a 20-year-old woman, honked at them to move out of the way, police reported. An officer was dispatched to Rockaway Road and Water Street … Continue reading
Posted in Criminals
Tagged bicycle, bicyclist, bike, biker, biking, convict scum, road warrior
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