Psychotic Bicyclist Jumps Up And Down On Top Of A Car And Spits Through The Sunroof Like A Goddamn Animal

Cash for Clunkers

[Santa Monica Mirror] A 21-year-old Venice bicyclist was arrested on Wednesday, Nov. 6 after climbing on top of a car that had just hit him, spitting through the sunroof at the driver, and then jumping up and down on top of the car roof while yelling about the lack of use of the turn signals on the vehicle.

Officers of the Santa Monica Police Department were requested to rush to the intersection of Ocean Avenue and Pacific Avenue at 7:42 pm on this day, which was the scene of the motor vehicle accident involving a car and the bicycle.

When they arrived the officers spoke with the driver of the vehicle who said that the bicyclist had become enraged after the minor collision incident, and had pulled himself up onto the side of his vehicle and spat at the driver through the open sun-roof.

The bicyclist had then climbed onto the roof of the vehicle and started to jump up and down like a chimpanzee. This caused much fear and panic in the mind of the driver.

On the one hand, I’d be pretty pissed if I got hit by a car. There’s no arguing THAT. So do I blame this bicyclist for losing his cool? Not one bit. But do I blame him for climbing on top of the car and jumping around like a motherfucking monkey on speed? You bet I do.

Because nothing gets people to abandon your cause faster than acting like a complete psychopath. It doesn’t even matter how right you are. You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar, and you win more sympathy by saying “ow” and calling the police than you do by jumping around like a goddamn animal. That’s just science.

Now at the same time is the driver in the right here? Sure doesn’t sound like it. When a driver doesn’t use their turn signal, I lose my mind whether I’m driving a car, walking on foot, or whatever else. Drives me absolutely fucking crazy. But that said, not once have I ever taken the steps to get out of my car, climb on top of their car, stomp around like a four-year-old throwing a tantrum, and spit on them from above. Who the fuck spits on people anymore, anyway? I didn’t even know that was still a thing.

PS. Yet another fine example of bicyclists having no understanding of physics and no concept of or regard for their own physical safety. Climbing on top of someone else’s car and assaulting them? This guy apparently has no idea that all the driver has to do is step on the gas pedal and he’ll be sent caroming backwards into the street at high speed. So kudos to the driver for keeping his cool. As always, the driver steps up to be the bigger man in a tough situation.

(image source)

About Falco

I hate bicyclists. My only regret is that I can't grow a beard.
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2 Responses to Psychotic Bicyclist Jumps Up And Down On Top Of A Car And Spits Through The Sunroof Like A Goddamn Animal

  1. Goon says:

    If that happened to me, the police would be scraping up bicyclist off the road. Not because I approve or encourage hurting riders. Rather, spitting on someone crosses a line and I believe a person should defend themselves in such an assault.

    Love hearing a bicyclist yelling about using turn signals. Since when do bicyclists care? When they are blowing through stop signs or traffic signals? Ignoring one way signs? Driving through pedestrians? When they aren’t bathing? When they are cooking their meth?

  2. r3dbull4dd1kt says:

    love to see a bikefuck try this in the Midwest…you know where people carry guns A LOT…

    allow me to explain…driver is in the wrong initially–we all acknowledge that–but he also pulled the fuck over and waited for the 5-0 to roll up and handle it…Peddles the Asstard decides to fuck up the guys car and spaz the hell out (obviously unharmed i might add)…that constitutes a pretty tangible threat and last time I checked Spandex not only made you look like a 1990s breakdancer but also isn’t bulletproof…

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