[Sport 360] After scaling the heights of his profession, Spanish cyclist Samuel Sanchez is planning on devoting his energies to the growth of his sport in the Middle East.

Sanchez, the gold medallist in the 2008 Olympics men’s road race, has spent his summer in Dubai offering his expertise to the local cycling federation and speaking to regional clubs.

The Spaniard has big plans and a clear idea of how he thinks Middle Eastern cycling can move on a par with Europe, North America and Australia. He believes the Middle East and the UAE have clear advantages that just need to be capitalised upon.

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Let me say this in no uncertain terms: if the UAE even lets this guy inside their borders, they’re the dumbest country on the face of the fucking earth. Dubai spent about a quadrillion dollars building the largest skyscrapers in the world, artificial islands, and every other futuristic bit of architecture and infrastructure you can imagine. Frankly I put the UAE about two years away from flying cars. They’re clearly heading that way. If Elon Musk was smart he’d have proposed his hyperloop to the oil barons of Dubai. They straight up cannot stop themselves from throwing money at every futuristic project that comes their way.

So does this jerkoff really think that the UAE is gonna look at the prospect of hoverboards and self-driving cars, then turn around and go “nah, you know what we’d rather have? BICYCLES.” No chance in fucking hell. I guarantee you, 100% GUARANTEE you that there will be a hoverboard lane in Dubai before a bike lane ever sees the light of day.

It’s like this guy has no idea that his battle has already been lost. In fact on second thought I take back what I said before. The UAE SHOULD let this guy in. Then they should follow him around with a documentary crew. It’ll be like watching a caveman wander through the modern world. He’ll be dead in two days.