Bicyclists Now Strapping $600 Plastic Bags to Their Heads in the Name of Safety; I See No Way This Could Go Wrong

(VIDEO)

Sure, a bicycle helmet can save your life in an accident, but it can also be murder on your freshly coifed hair.

Now there’s an alternative — an airbag for your head. And like the ones in your car, when it’s not in use, the Hovding collar tucks neatly and stylishly around your neck, claims its Swedish manufacturer.

“Hovding is a collar for bicyclists, worn around the neck,” according to the Hovding website. “The collar contains a folded-up airbag that you’ll only see if you happen to have an accident. The airbag is shaped like a hood, surrounding and protecting the bicyclist’s head. The trigger mechanism is controlled by sensors which pick up the abnormal movements of a bicyclist in an accident.”

The manufacturers claim the airbag takes 0.1 second to inflate and “will be fully inflated before head impact.”

According to news reports, it took inventors Anna Haupt and Terese Alstin six years to develop the collar. It currently costs about $600 and, according to the Hovding website, is currently only available in Scandinavia. (Chicago Sun-Times)

First off, that video has to be fake, right? Like there’s no way they’re using that as an actual selling point. “Hey, bicyclists! Are you so retarded that you are unable to avoid stationary objects in the path of your apparently impossible to steer bicycle? Here! Strap this plastic bag to your head!”

Actually I guess this makes sense. If you’re dumb enough to use the “airbag helmet,” then you’re probably dumb enough to stick your head inside a plastic bag. Go for it, bicyclists! I hope you don’t land on anything sharp! Like, uhhh, I don’t know, gravel?

PS. I love that the “trigger mechanism is controlled by sensors which pick up the abnormal movements of a bicyclist.” I can’t wait for the first douchebag bicyclist to lean forward to flip off a motorist and wind up flipped over the handlebars trying to claw the plastic off his face before he fucking suffocates.

PPS. 

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About Falco

I hate bicyclists. My only regret is that I can't grow a beard.
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One Response to Bicyclists Now Strapping $600 Plastic Bags to Their Heads in the Name of Safety; I See No Way This Could Go Wrong

  1. Pingback: I Bet You Thought Those Inflatable Bike Helmets Were Pretty Stupid, Didn’t You? Well Guess What, You Were Right! | I HATE BICYCLISTS

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