I Could Watch This Bicyclist Get Run Over By A Motorcycle All Day Long And Not Get Tired Of It

Screen Shot 2013-04-30 at 2.14.28 PM[Gizmodo] First off, save me your fucking moralizing: everybody walked away from this just fine, which means it is absolutely 100% fine to laugh at this bicyclist getting flipped 7 feet in the air and landing on his fucking brainstem.

And seriously, is it even possible to not laugh at this? Just look at that picture up there. The dude is still in the cycling position even as he’s being flipped end over end over a motorcycle. That’s how disconnected from reality bicyclists are: not only do they not think the laws of the road apply to them, they apparently don’t even think the laws of physics apply to them. It never entered into this guy’s head that he could be forcefully removed from his bike. Even while it’s happening his brain won’t accept it. “It feels like I have been sent hurtling through the air, but surely that is impossible, for I am of the immortal cabal of bicyclists. JUST KEEP PEDALING, LEGS.”

I guess this just drives home the point I’ve been trying to make for ages: bicyclists have no concept of how fragile their vehicle of choice is. I mean this dude didn’t even get hit by a car. He got hit by a motorcycle, a vehicle which is only slightly larger than a bike, and STILL got obliterated. Look at this shit:

Screen Shot 2013-04-30 at 2.20.07 PMNo no, it’s cool guys. No need to stop at red lights. I mean we just watched a tiny motorcycle eat this dude’s bike alive when it hit him while going the SAME DIRECTION as him. I’m sure you’ll be fine when a mack truck t-bones you on the way to the skintight bodysuit store.

Anyway, enjoy watching this video 500 times like I did:

 

PS. That’s right: I’m back, baby. Sorry for the lack of content.

About Falco

I hate bicyclists. My only regret is that I can't grow a beard.
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13 Responses to I Could Watch This Bicyclist Get Run Over By A Motorcycle All Day Long And Not Get Tired Of It

  1. James O says:

    You are an awful human being.

    • Falco says:

      I may be an awful human being, but at least I don’t block traffic.

      • Dave says:

        cos blocking traffic is up there on the 10 commandments isnt it?

        along with thou shalt not kill and thou shalt not commit adultery and all that god stuff… yep. blocking traffic. that’d be one to be punishable by death, wouldnt it?

        watch it again, and have a look where the cyclist was when he was hit.

      • Falco says:

        Frankly, God’s failure to include “don’t block traffic” in the 10 Commandments is one of his greatest oversights.

  2. R3dbull4dd1kt says:

    you know what? I give this motorcycle rider all due credit…great shot indeed…however motorcyclists in my area are barely one step above bicyclists; they’re a bunch of batshit crazy halfwits who blatantly ignore traffic laws and generally participate if fucktardary…but this dude is the exception, because frankly, smoking a bicycler and fucking up his little toy is epic awesomesauce–doesn’t matter what the fuck he was driving as long as nobody was killed or seriously injured

  3. Revsin says:

    I’m a motorcyclists, no not the kind that rips the baffles out to wake the unborn in neighboring continents, nor do I pretend that every road I am on is the Isle of Mann TT mountain course. But one who chooses to ride a motorcycle 95% of the year as it’s more fun than driving a car, better on gas, easier find parking spaces, etc. I ride respectfully and I’m doing my best not get myself killed doing so. “I’m one of the good ones”, I promise!

    But I absolutely loathe bicyclists, not all of them mind you. But all the ones that dress in spandex and choose to ride in the worst possible place imaginable.

    The road they are on is known as ‘The Snake’ in the canyons near Los Angles. It’s a bit famous from being a premier road for reckless motorcyclists to exceed their capabilities and there are hundreds of bike wrecks recorded at that very turn on that road.

    Choosing to ride your bicycle on a road known for such jackassery is just asking to be hurt or worse. Being of sound mind myself, I wouldn’t even elect to ride my motorcycle on that road because it’s too well known for being populated by other riders with balls so big they require orthopedic pants to contain them; but an IQ smaller than their dick’s circumference.

    The same as I wouldn’t ride in a hail storm, breakdance on the highway or stick my member into the hot tailpipe of your Mom’s Camry. These are all things an extreme cyclist would do if they weren’t obstructing traffic.

    One of my many beefs with cyclists is that I’m put at even more risks because of their hogging the road during rush hour traffic. A car has to take a wide pass around the asshole with nowhere to be, into my lane and encroaches my space. Thing is that I’m doing the posted 65mph and heading straight for a ton of car. I can’t fault the driver in the scenario, he or she has places to be and wants to avert their eyes off your spandex ass. But they focus on your ass cause they don’t want to get sued as a result of hitting your pious ass. All while watching you be a jerk, they don’t even see that I’m there.

    Sadly this happens most of the time to me as the result of Mormon missionary kids, it’s hard to hate a Mormon kid… until he’s on a bicycle.

    What I don’t ever understand is that all these dudes are out there cycling on the busiest streets in town, pedaling 60-100 miles in a day. For what? What are they training for? They all claim it’s for a race. But other than the Tour de France, I have never seen or heard of a race taking place.

    Bicycling isn’t green, they aren’t saving the planet. It’s causing us to use even more fossil fuel, emit more carbon dioxide, being stuck behind them, unnecessary braking and accelerating past them. Causing stress which leads to more aggressive driving.

    Thank you for creating this site and increasing the awareness of the obvious: cyclists suck.

    • Falco says:

      That was the best, most well-written and informative comment I have ever received on this blog. Thank you for taking the time to not only share your experience, but lend a tremendous amount of credence to the argument we have spent the last year trying to make: namely, that bicyclists suck.

      • revsin says:

        I was in the mood to watch this a dozen more times. After watching it I can’t stomach just how big of a pussy the cyclist is. Yeah he got hit by a motorcycle. But his wheel absorbed so much energy, then the motorcyclist absorbed all 89lbs of bicyclist. The only thing that happened to this dude is he got roadrash on his ass and shredded his spandex cycling shorts. Get the fuck up already! I got t-boned by a Cadillac on a motorcycle and didn’t even go down, in fact I giggled in my helmet cause I was expecting to be a world of hurt. Felt like playfully body checking a hollow core door in a shitty apartment. So sad to watch this guy flounder and be so dramatic. If this was the Army, I would feel worse for his commanding officer to have to report back to his family with, “It is my duty to inform you the survivors that your son was injured cycling while being a complete pussy about it, I know this brings great shame to you, me and the nation he represents. America owes you our debt of gratitude, the debt will be repaid when this guy stops being such a dripping snatch about a little scrape”

  4. scott says:

    You’re an ignorant dumbass, i feel bad for you after reading how stupid you sound and apparently are. im a cyclist and you better hope we never meet in person for your sake

  5. Grown Up says:

    To me, the saddest thing is that the author of this blog actually has a pretty good sense of humor and a knack for satirical writing. Unfortunately, all of this talent is wasted on his dedication to maintaining a blog that very few people care about. Not only is this blog a pointless, meaningless collection of drivel, but it showcases the adolescent soul that exists deep inside the blogger. This poor writer is obsessed with a hatred toward cyclists and revels (while pretending to be non-violent) in watching carefully-chosen YouTube videos of cyclists suffering.

    While I have laughed at some of the jokes this angry 11-year-old-acting blogger has written, the blog has convinced me even more so that most guys who live in D.C. are complete douche bags.

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