Contender for Dumbest Bicyclist Ever Just Riding Around with Stolen Property and Three Outstanding Warrants

A man stopped by Napa police for a warrant check ended up being booked into jail on suspicion of possessing a wallet, identification and credit cards that had allegedly been reported stolen, police said.

Kristopher Scott Booth, a 38-year-old Napa resident, was stopped around 7:15 p.m. Sunday as he rode his bicycle in the area of Old Sonoma Road and Roosevelt Street, police said.

The officer arrested him on three outstanding warrants, police said. A search of Booth allegedly revealed a wallet, identification and credit cards that had been reported stolen on Aug. 20.

Booth was booked into the Napa jail, police said. The items were returned to the owner.  [Napa Valley Register]

See, this one I get. Just a bad situation for the bicyclist here. I mean let’s face it, if you’re riding around with three outstanding warrants, the FIRST thing you’re gonna do is try to get ahold of somebody else’s ID just in case a cop pulls you over. Self-preservation 101. Pretty sure that’s what dad always taught me: if being yourself ever starts to be a disadvantage, go be somebody else. Pretty sure that’s what he said.

Anyway let’s be real for a second. You’ve got three outstanding warrants and you’re just bombing around town carrying the wallet you stole a week ago? Bro I’ve never stolen a single thing in my goddamn life but I’m pretty sure even I can figure out that you ditch the evidence after you grab the cash and max out the cards. Am I just totally one step ahead of everyone here? Am I some kind of thievery genius? Or is this guy just the dumbest motherfucker ever to sit on a bicycle?

About Falco

I hate bicyclists. My only regret is that I can't grow a beard.
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