[BayNews9] TAMPA — Deputies are looking for a man who stole a Hillsborough County school bus driver’s purse, then rode away on a bicycle.
The incident happened on the morning of May 20 while the bus was parked on Yorkshire Drive in Tampa.
According to reports, the suspect boarded the school bus and took the bus driver’s purse. The suspect then fled from the scene on a dark-colored mountain bike.
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Listen, I live in DC. Once in a while you get a great, friendly bus driver. But for the most part, they’re horrible, awful husks of human beings who don’t give two shits about you or anyone else in this world.
So maybe you think I don’t care about this bus driver having his phone stolen by a bicyclist. But you couldn’t be more wrong. In fact, I think the fact that bus drivers are such horrible, hateful people makes this a thousand times worse.
Because bus drivers don’t have much in this world. They just don’t. They don’t have money. They probably don’t have love. I mean would you marry a bus driver? I don’t fucking think so. All they have is their four square miles of road that they loop around day after day after day after day after day. That, and their phone that they can play Jetpack Joyride on when they get a lunch break. That’s literally it. So when Charlie Tenspeed rolls his arrogant ass onto the bus and steals this driver’s phone, he’s literally making off with half his worldly possessions. And that’s low. That’s real low. Even for a bicyclist.
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proving once again just how stupid bicyclists really are; declaring war on one of the largest vehicles on the road, operated exclusively by subpar humans, equipped with substandard brakes and full of witnesses…brilliant…whats next, Dump Trucks?!
A+ analysis. I salute you.