Bicyclists Are Just Out There Punching Buses Now

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[York Mix] A cyclist punched and smashed a bus window as it went through York city centre. Now police have released a CCTV image of a man they want to talk to about the incident.

At about 5pm on December 20 a First York Bus with passengers on board was travelling over Ouse Bridge when a passing cyclist punched a window and smashed it.

No one on board was injured.

I’ve never accused bicyclists of being smart. Their continued disregard for their own personal safety clearly proves that they are not. No matter how many times one of them gets flattened by a car, they still feel empowered to fly through every red light, carefree and filled with the lunatic certainty that nothing can harm them.

And it’s one thing when it’s just cars. I mean, I’m taller than most cars. I guess if my mental faculties were somewhere around those of a third grader (which I imagine is true of most bicyclists), I might think that, since I’m taller than a car, it can’t hurt me. Biggest kid makes the rules. Might makes right. You know, all of that. It’s not accurate, but hey, if you’re a moron or a child, it makes a certain amount of sense.

But a bus? A fucking bus? You’re going to fight a fucking bus?

Consider boxing. Boxing is one of the most violent sports on earth. Just two people bashing each other’s brains in, round after round. Even the winning boxer usually comes away bruised, battered, and bleeding. Now consider that before a boxing match, there is a weigh-in to make sure that both boxers are below the agreed-upon weight. For the most part, this means that boxers are within a few pounds of each other when it’s time to fight. For instance, before the Mayweather/McGregor fight last year, Mayweather weighed in at 149.5 lbs, McGregor at 153 lbs. A pretty negligible difference.

Now further consider that the average bicyclist probably weighs somewhere in the neighborhood of 175 lbs, while the average bus weights around 30,000 lbs. Most boxers won’t fight an opponent outside of their weight class. This dumb son of a bitch wants to fight a 10-foot-tall steel contraption that outweighs him by 29,825 lbs! Many would say that this is not a smart decision!

Look. I’m not a scientist. I don’t know much about mass and acceleration and relative speed. But I do know a few things. You don’t tug on Superman’s cape. You don’t spit into the wind. And you definitely don’t put your fist through the window of a fucking bus.  Buses kill hundreds of people a year ACCIDENTALLY, the last thing you want to do is give a 15-ton death machine capable of reducing you to a red smear on the pavement a reason to kill you INTENTIONALLY. Just one man’s opinion.

P.S. I do admit that I’m a little shook that a bicyclist could just casually smash a bus window. I’m not sure if this makes me a little bit afraid of this bicyclist or a little bit afraid to ride a bus now. Probably a little of column A, a little of column B.

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About Falco

I hate bicyclists. My only regret is that I can't grow a beard.
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5 Responses to Bicyclists Are Just Out There Punching Buses Now

  1. Bikecrusher Bob says:

    He’s probably been injecting himself with who knows what sorts of roids and hormones like his hero Lance Armstrong. Just got a surge of hyper-testosterone rage and lashed out. Hopefully the next needle that jabs him in his asscheek is attached to a tranquilizer dart.

  2. Bikecrusher Bob says:

    Now they’re demanding respect by cycling in the nude!

  3. BlackQueen says:

    Well, the laws of physics should come into much need mandatory training for cyclists – that’s if there should be any road cycling at all. In both Ireland and the UK, I’d have cycling banned on the public roads altogether – most are too narrow (both urban and rural) and given the clear advantage that buses, trams and cars have over cyclists in terms of speed and connectivity, the bicycle is best left in the folk park – one can always walk the last half mile. For exercise, I walk and it’s far less stressful than riding a bike.

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